The Top 5 Games Gritskrieg shouldn’t be allowed to play… Ever.

It’s an understatement to say that I love games. It would be more to the point to say that I *live* games. I love the storylines, the graphics, the gameplay and each game comes with its own unique “flavor” which may or may not keep me coming back for more. And then there are those games which appeal to some portion of my psyche and latch onto me, refusing to release me from its diabolical grip. These are the games I love to play but shouldn’t be allowed to play.

The list below comprises some of the most insidious games I’ve played in the recent past. Each one has its own draw and while I am not telling anyone to avoid these games, I am advising caution… Because if you’re anything like me, they’ll consume large portions of your free time without you realizing it until you glance up at the clock and realize you’ve been playing for the last four hours straight. Which may explain why your bladder is hurting and you’re starving.

When I play these games, I find myself bargaining with the clock. I only need three hours of sleep, right? I can catch a later movie. My friends won’t be that mad if I show up a little late. I can always get a haircut tomorrow. And that’s why I avoid some games like the plague. Not because I don’t like them but because I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that once I play that first little bit, I’m going to be in for the long haul.

So, for better or worse, here is my list of five games which I should not be allowed to play in reverse order.

What do you do after you collect all the bobbleheads in Fallout 3?

What do you do after you collect all the bobbleheads in Fallout 3?

#5 Fallout 3 – I’ve beat this game. I’ve bought and played through every expansion. I’ve even collected every single bobblehead. There shouldn’t be anything left to do and yet somehow, magically, I find things to do. Most recently I have begun decorating my home in the Wastelands. And no, I don’t mean buying one of the schemes. I’m talking about wandering the wastes looking for things that will look good on my bookshelf. I have become a post-apocalyptic interior designer. I find something I like, I take it home, I drop it from my inventory and then meticulously place it somewhere in my home. And because I have to have things set up a certain way, I may decide I need another of whatever it is I just used in my home and so back out into the wastelands I go. And every time I head out for more decorations, I find another portion of the map I haven’t fully explored, another quest I haven’t done, another *something* to keep me playing “just another 30 minutes”.

#4: World of Warcraft – I’m probably not the only one who would list Blizzard’s MMO as a game they shouldn’t be allowed to play. Whether it’s running dailies, heroic dungeons, or finishing out the last bit of quests in one of the new areas, WoW has managed to keep me hooked since its launch almost five years ago. I personally rated it a 2 on our Busy Gamer scale because there was always the potential to play with friends but as time has passed and we’ve seen two expansions, I find this game continually comes up with some means to pull me back in.

First you go out and collect all of the Vault jumpsuits, arrange them in your house in numerical order...

First you go out and collect all of the Vault jumpsuits, arrange them in your house in numerical order...

#3: The Elder Scrolls: Oblivion – Another Bethesda entry and potentially more addictive than Fallout 3. Let’s put it this way, I’ve completed all of the assassin quests, became a vampire, finished out the thieves’ guild line, moved on to several other guilds, and have over 100 hours played on this game. Sadly, I have yet to do even the first quest in the main storyline. That’s right, I haven’t set foot through an Oblivion Gate. The world’s fate lies in the hands of the guy trying to see which of his houses he wants to decorate. Oh, yeah, I forgot to mention… I decorate my houses on this game, too.

#2: Any Final Fantasy title – There’s more than one. We all know it. But Square keeps rubbing it in our face that they know how to make RPG titles. And I keep letting them. Whether it’s a day with my Nintendo DSi and the port of the first two Final Fantasy chronicles or firing up the PS2 to see what Cloud and his gang are up to, all of the titles have managed to capture and maintain my interest since the original Nintendo Entertainment system. After discovering that Final Fantasy 1 was just as addictive as I remembered, I swore off of purchasing any of the revamps for any of my systems.

...and then, if you haven't become a big enough geek yet, start decorating your home.

...and then, if you haven't become a big enough geek yet, start decorating your home.

#1: Mass Effect – I don’t even know where to begin with this game. I don’t have to worry about decorating any houses but I’ve spent many hours trying to get everyone on my crew into the same armor type so no matter who I choose as my party, we all match. I forego better armor to keep my squad looking slick. I have multiple playthroughs on this game and I still keep finding new content even before the DLC was available. It was the first game on Xbox 360 that actually made me want to get every stupid achievement. That’s why for over a year now, my profile pic on Xbox Live has been the “N7″ pic. I earned that bad boy and I’m going to make sure everyone knows it for years to come.

So there they are, my five bad habits. You’ll notice I only included screenshots for one. I think that’s plenty to convey my point. Make of it what you will but when you’re a gamer, you know the dangers of your truly favorite game and how quickly it can consume a full day if you’re not careful.

And now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go hibernate in a cave till World of Warcraft’s new expansion and/or Mass Effect 2 is out in stores.

Gritskrieg – End of Line

Posted By Gritskrieg

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