I knew gaming was becoming a part of the larger culture the first time I encountered a World of Warcraft poser. (He said he rolled a level 42 Orc. I said I’d always wanted to play an Orc and asked how he liked it. He said Orcs are the best..)

But now, not only do people want to seem like bigger gamer geeks than they are, but companies also want to sell products that say “I’m such a gamer that even my _____ is specifically for gamers.??? Headsets? Sure. Mousepads? Okay. Tee shirts? Been there… now what? Well.. we’ve come to expect consumables in game. Now we can have them IRL too! While I am yet to encounter a product that can truly increase my fire resistance, during a recent expedition to Fry’s I was able to acquire a Mana Energy Potion, a Health Energy Potion, and a little snack pack called Gamer Grub. I fearlessly tested these products on myself, and am now back with my report.

Gamer Grub:
Gamer Grub at first glance seemed to be nothing but a title slapped on a product as a marketing ploy. But on closer inspection, I realized that the pouch it comes in is functional- its meant to be poured into your mouth from the pouch, thereby avoiding greasy fingers and crumbs in the keyboard. That’s something that my abused keyboard is definitely pleading for. It comes in flavors such as Pizza, “PB&J???, Wasabi, and Chocolate.

Tested during: World of Warcraft dungeoning and Mini-Ninjas.

Taste: Very good. I chose the pizza flavor. Like pizza, but with sort of a trail mix feeling of wholesome-ness. It doesn’t suck.

Gamer appeal: Eat out of the pouch- easy to eat while gaming. Scientifically formulated to “support fast cognitive performance.??? I couldn’t tell if my brain was working better than normal or not, but the pouch system works well, and it has MAJOR hunger fighting power.

The verdict overall: It’s a good product. I’d eat it again, and I’d try some of the other flavors, but at about four bucks a pop for a 4oz. pouch.. well, I’d rather you bought it for me.

Mana Energy Potion
Mana Energy Potion gains instant appeal because it’s cute. It’s blue, and it comes in a little potion bottle. It has 25 calories per serving, and contains various B vitamins, vitamin C, caffeine, and taurine, among other things. Basically, it’s an energy potion because its a single-shot energy drink, and its for gamers because it knocks off WoW without quite being a copyright infringement and non-gamers probably think it’s dorky.

Tested during: L4D.

Taste: Bleh. Popsicles, flat soda, and somehow, Red Bull with dirt in it. It doesn’t make you gag, and it’s easier than a shot of say Rumpleminze, but its not that good.

Gamer appeal: We all need energy for late night marathons of course. Cute potion style bottle. It’s called Mana!

The verdict overall: Mediocre. An hour after taking it, I felt energized but jittery. Two hours afterwards, I got hit with a hard crash. It’s a nice novelty, but aside from that, I don’t see much of a reason to buy this as opposed to 5 Hour Energy, which in my experience, works better.

Health Energy Potion
Health Energy Potion is the counterpart of Mana. It has slightly different vitamins, and its red, but its packaged in a similar World of Warcraft-reminiscent style. I went into the Health trial a bit more biased however, because Health got me in trouble in the airport- I got detained at security because I forgot it was in my laptop bag.

Tested during: CoDMW2, WoW leveling, and editing some nerd videos.

Taste: I thought Mana was lack luster.. then I tasted Health. Its the same popsicle and dirty Red Bull flavor, but with syrupy red food coloring and a dash of cinnamon. It’s not over powering cinnamon like Hot Damn, just enough to be unexpected in an annoying way.

Gamer appeal: Once again, energy for late night gaming, and cute potion packaging- but this one’s for tanks!

The verdict overall: So so. After getting jittery off of Mana, I decided to take this one in increments instead of in one shot. It kept the jittery-ness at bay, but I never felt a distinct surge of awakeness. Much like Mana, the only inspiration I see for purchasing this is novelty. If you are putting together a gift package for an obsessed WoW player (esp. if they were a tank during the pot chugging era!) then get it. If you want energy, get 5 Hour Energy.